There comes a time in every family when somebody decides they need a little space.
For Canada, that apparently means looking across the Atlantic and asking Europe: “So… how serious are you about this associate membership thing?”
European Commission President Ursula von der Leyen recently floated the idea of making Canada the European Union’s first “associate member,” while Prime Minister Mark Carney has welcomed the idea of building a deeper alliance with Europe. The important fine print is that nobody actually knows exactly what “associate member” means yet, because the EU doesn’t currently have such a membership category.
But Canadians are nothing if not enthusiastic about filling in the blanks.
For starters, there is the possibility of Canada developing an even more European travel relationship. Current discussions include greater mobility for Canadians, including opportunities to live, work and study in Europe, although the exact arrangements remain to be negotiated.
And then there is the rumoured benefit that has already captured the Canadian imagination: easier travel around Europe, potentially including passport-free movement under whatever future arrangement emerges.
Now, obviously, this is where we need to stop and clarify that Canadians still need a passport to travel internationally. Current European travel rules certainly have not transformed the Pearson departure lounge into a giant European backyard.
But imagine if they did.
“Where are you going this weekend?”
“Switzerland.”
“Business?”
“No. Powder.”
Suddenly every Canadian with a Costco membership and a slightly suspicious bank account is booking a ski chalet in the Swiss Alps.
“Money laundering?”
“No, no. Ski trip.”
And if we are going to embrace Europe, we might as well do it properly.
Forget visiting the local Oktoberfest-themed beer garden where a guy named Kevin wears lederhosen he bought at Walmart.
We’re going to the actual Oktoberfest.
We’ll arrive in Munich and spend three days saying, “Wow, this is just like the one in Halifax,” before somebody gently explains that it absolutely is not.
There could be other cultural complications.
Canadian Thanksgiving would remain in October, but suddenly somebody’s German cousin would be asking why we celebrate Thanksgiving a month before everyone else.
Our hockey players might start demanding European-style vacation packages.
Nova Scotians could discover that somewhere in Europe, public transportation actually runs frequently enough that you can plan your day around it.
And the federal government could spend five years negotiating whether “associate member” Canadians should be permitted to bring a jar of peanut butter through a European airport.
Meanwhile, somewhere south of the border, our old neighbour would be standing on the porch wondering what happened.
Because let’s be honest: Canada and the United States have spent decades living like neighbours who accidentally became roommates.
We share roads, power grids, television, sports leagues, supply chains, lakes (I know this one’s a hot topic), forests, airspace and approximately 9,000 arguments an hour about hockey.
The United States has been the giant, occasionally unpredictable neighbour who borrows the lawnmower and then announces it is going to build a wall around the driveway.
And Canada, apparently, is now considering saying: “You know what? We should probably spend more time with the relatives in Europe.”
Which brings us to the truly bizarre historical part.
Canada spent generations evolving away from direct British control to become its own country, while retaining the British Crown as part of its constitutional system.
Now, in a spectacular twist of history, Canada could theoretically find itself loosening some of its closest ties with its continental neighbour while strengthening its historic relationship with the old country and the broader European family.
It would be the geopolitical equivalent of leaving home, getting your own apartment, moving across town, and then inviting your grandparents to become your roommates.
The United States might reasonably ask: “After everything we’ve been through?”
Canada would reply: “It’s not you. It’s Europe.”
Of course, none of this means Canada is actually packing its bags and moving to Brussels.
The proposed arrangement could take years to negotiate, and the legal and economic details are still very much up in the air. Canada already has a major trade agreement with the EU through CETA, and the proposed relationship would be something considerably more ambitious.
Still, it is hard not to appreciate the comedy of the situation.
For most of Canadian history, the big question was how closely we should tie ourselves to the Americans.
Now the question seems to be whether Canada should politely excuse itself from the neighbourhood barbecue, cross the Atlantic and ask Europe if there’s room at the table.
And if Europe says yes?
Well, somebody better tell Uncle Sam.
And pack the lederhosen.