Who wants a random column? You do. That’s who.
My friends and I watching the teaser trailer for the third Wolverine movie dovetailed into a discussion of other superhero properties owned by 20th Century Fox. This naturally led to a discussion about the ill-fated iterations of the Fantastic Four.
An acquaintance suggested trying to get Netflix on board, such as with Daredevil, and making a lighthearted, less gritty series. I think the only way a F4 series or movie would work is if it is animated. The F4 villains are either too goofy (Galactus, a planet eating entity) or too menacing (Dr. Doom, an evil scientist who rules his own country with Kim Jong Un-like diplomacy) for live action. The three movies so far tried to produce viable versions of Galactus and Dr. Doom but it was a no-go on all fronts. Granted the entirety of those movies is a giant tire fire littered with soiled diapers, so you can’t really blame the bad guys. I’d like to see Netflix take on the X-Men, another property Fox is running into the ground, because the wealth of characters seems more in line with a television series. Think about it… it could be like Friday Night Lights but with superpowers instead of football.
And…. now my brain is off and running.
Ok, so Kyle Chandler would play an aged Cyclops and Connie Britton would play Jean Grey/Phoenix. (So this casting is probably a terrible idea but I loved those two together as Coach and Tammy. I’d be willing to watch them read a catalogue together. Fine, cast who you want. ) They would take over the school for Professor X, still played by Patrick Stewart because why the heck not? We keep Wolverine out of it because Wolverine can handle a movie on his own. He is far from the most interesting mutant, at least from a powers perspective, but he does fit the mold of a generic action hero so just let him stay on the silver screen.
Relative unknowns will play the rest of the X-Men because I like the term relative unknowns and they also have less to lose and seem to try harder. Also, they seem to try harder.
The bad guys will actually carry a little weight. (No, that is not a pun about the size of Blob. I just want a bad guy who is realistically bad and not just “we must take over the world”.) I am done with Magneto so a few minor baddies and possibly an arc involving human officials trying to kidnap and control the kids at the school would work.
We also don’t need a bad guy every episode but solid action sequences are necessary so Netflix can dial up the people who worked on the Daredevil series. PG-13 is fine for the rating as long as they don’t play things too safe. Again, Netflix seems to be doing fine in this department so no changes are required. I would ask that the writers let the kids behave like actually kids, which means sex, drugs and the rest.
In conclusion, I was feeling a little weird after last week’s column so I decided to go for complete fluff this time around.
I’m done now.